I’m lost. Or at least, I feel lost. It happens every now and then, and I usually tell Jack that getting lost isn’t a bad thing. It’s a form of exploring.
It’s only June and I’ve already hit some big goals for sixes. For most triathletes the season is just gearing up as summer hits and the big open water events kick off (woah, too many sporting analogies in a sporting blog article). Everyone’s excited, motivation is high. The win the other week in the Gloucester Triathlon was great, and a big effort, and was something I’d kind of eyed up in the preparation for the 2012 season. I think I was a bit wary of my first triathlon win though, after waiting (what felt like) a long time for my first bike race win back when I was a junior and the subsequent troubles trying to replicate that high. It was a big goal, and then an awesome feeling to obtain, and after that I struggled a little working out where to go next and what to do. An opportunity or two arose and I piled headlong into even greater training efforts, burning myself out and missing out. It’s an experience I’d like to avoid. Am I a more experienced athlete now? Dunno.
I’ve got a bunch of races lined up through until September and a number of things that I’m aiming for. But I’m not sure what I’m trying to do. On the simplest levels this is what I do now, and in racing terms when the horn sounds I just go fast. There’s not that much thinking. My body just goes fast and the preparation I’ve done up to that point pretty much determines what happens. Race day is like exam day. If you’ve done the work, you’ll get the result.
So do I just go through the motions? Do I set new targets? Who am I trying to impress? Myself?
I’ve got long term goals. Or maybe even very long term goals. I guess some of them are extremely long term goals. I’ve got years of work in mind, and levels of fitness and ability that come with 1000s of hours of consistent training. Like I said, it’s just what I do. Those goals keep me going on a day to day, week to week, month to month and year to year basis. What I do is fun, and I’d struggle to stop if I wanted to.
But how to endure? Much of racing is a test of who can suffer the most. Some of that comes with training, some with racing experience, and some because you want something enough. So what do I want?
Maybe that will appear on race day, but I think I need to work out what I want to get out of the rest of the season. I could just settle back and say that I just want to get a good, solid season of race experience and fitness development that will serve me well in the future. That’s a good goal in itself. Long term. The experiences of racing, going to new places, looking forward to travelling and seeing the guys from the club are often reward enough, but not an immediate drive to suffer. Do I want more wins? Yes, sure, but much of that depends on who turns up on the day as there will always be someone out there faster than you. What about specific times, placings, and other rewards? Time goals can be awkward in triathlon as courses vary so much, and weather conditions can blow plans away. Consistent placings are always a good driving motivator. A natural competitor always struggles to not race hard. Maybe that’s enough?
Training goals remain, of certain consistency targets, a particular volume target for this training year, and test performances. You’d think it would be tough to push it hard in training when you’re struggling for race motivation but funnily enough when I’ve got the bit between my teeth the wattage, pace or effort gets pushed out.
Hmm. I’m racing in the Shropshire Triathlon next Sunday (British Age Group Standard Distance Triathlon Champs – quite a mouthful) so I’d better get it sorted out I guess. Tiptoeing the edge of the overtraining cliff affects mood, so maybe a lovely taper will help.
